Would You Let Someone Speak To You THIS WAY?

Do you like be talked down to?

When someone speaks to you as if you are dim-witted, slow or generally incapable of doing something, do you feel good?

Perhaps you might be motivated to prove them wrong, if you’re “lucky.”  But most folks are de-motivated.

Depending on when this takes place in your life and who does the damage, the impact on your sense of self-confidence can be devastating.   Research does confirm this dynamic but even without the research, it’s a pretty self-evident fact that negativity breeds more of the same.

The negative words and messages that you or someone else puts into your psyche will, if you don’t interrupt the cycle, produce negative outcomes.

There’s negative impact on health, stress, self-confidence and productivity.  More information on this research can be found here: http://stress.about.com/od/optimismspirituality/a/selftalk.htm

So tell me, if we know and accept this, why do we continue to engage in negative self-talk? If we don’t want others to speak to us in negative ways, why is it OK to do it to our self? (reminds me of the ‘N’ word controversy!)

In creating new success habits, negative self-talk produces the complete opposite mental posture that you need.  Things like “I can’t do this,”  “I always mess up,” “This is too hard for me,” don’t help you to increase your resolve and commitment.  They do the opposite.

You need a positive, optimistic, self-confident posture. Changing, breaking and making habits are undertakings that require your most positive outlook.   They  go against everything your body yearns for – patterns are so very comfortable for humans!  (especially the ones that bring some pleasure)

A negative self-image will NOT motivate you to take action daily with  something as challenging as creating  new and powerful success habit.

Have you ever taken a major exam or made an important presentation where you wanted/needed to do well? How did you prepare?  Did you stay out all night? Did you show up to the exam hungry and dead beat?  Did you not bother to study or prepare? Did you walk with no materials, pen or pencils?

If you wanted to do well, the answers here are pretty obvious. Chances are you did everything you needed to do in order to be rested, fed and prepared.

Apply that thinking here and check your self-talk.  Your daily preparation for this ‘major exam’ of creating new success habits is checking your thoughts before they manifest.  Before you even have a thought, you have an emotion…monitor these.  They can lead down a path of self-sabotage.

Of course you can acknowledge negative emotions and maybe even sit with them for a bit – within reason, this is a good thing.   However, you must  exercise control over these negative emotions by not having them produce unhelpful, negative thinking and behaviors.

Remaining conscious and aware throughout this process is essential.

The things you say and the questions you ask during this crucial time  will determine your success.

How to create successful habits is all about your thoughts. What are you thinking? What questions are you asking?

Is it “why am I doing this anyway?” or is it “what can I do to succeed with this effort?”

Is it “why do I always mess up?” or is it “how can I approach this project with a better attitude, this time?”

Whatever you ask, the answer for THAT question will manifest.   Whatever you think, the behavior for that thought will manifest.

Think thoughts and take actions that lead to the consistently magnificent life you wish to live.

Share some of your power thoughts or questions; we would love to hear how you approach the challenging moments.

Wishing You Abundant Prosperity, Peace and Joy!
Julette Millien

♥♥♥~~~

Success and Habits: Quotes

Habit Quotes

These are some powerful quotes about creating new habits, the importance of good habits and how to achieve success.

A suggestion: Select one or two per week and write them on cards, placing where you can see them often.  Aspire to LIVE the meaning in your day to day life.  Commit them to memory – which would mean saying them often.

Have fun!

There can be NO success without the habit of forgiveness

~ Julette Millien ~

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.

~ Aristotle ~

A habit cannot be tossed out the window; it must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time.

~ Mark Twain ~

The victory of success is half won when one gains the habit of setting goals and achieving them. Even the most tedious chore will become endurable as you parade through each day convinced that every task, no matter how menial or boring, brings you closer to fulfilling your dreams.

~ Og Mandino ~

Winners make a habit of manufacturing their own positive expectations in advance of the event.

~ Brian Tracy ~

The beginning of pride and hatred lies in worldly desire, and the strength of your desire if from habit. When an evil tendency becomes confirmed by habit, rage is triggered when anyone restrains you.

~ Mevlana Rumi ~

Your mind will be like its habitual thoughts; for the soul becomes dyed with the color of its thoughts. Soak it then in such trains of thoughts as, for example: Where life is possible at all, a right life is possible.

~ Marcus Aurelius ~

The successful person makes a habit of doing what the failing person doesn’t like to do.

~ Thomas Edison ~

Repetition of the same thought or physical action develops into a habit which, repeated frequently enough, becomes an automatic reflex.

~ Norman Vincent Peale ~

Winners have simply formed the habit of doing things losers don’t like to do

~ Albert Gray ~

Quality is not an act, it is a habit.

~ Aristotle ~

Ninety-nine percent of all failures come from people who have a habit of making excuses.

~ George Washington Carver ~

The individual who wants to reach the top in business must appreciate the might and force of habit. He must be quick to break those habits that can break him–and hasten to adopt those practices that will become the habits that help him achieve the success he desires.

~ J. Paul Getty ~

Success is a matter of understanding and religiously practicing specific, simple habits that always lead to success.

~ Robert J. Ringer ~

Genius means little more than the faculty of perceiving in an unhabitual way.

~ William James ~

The soul, like the body, accepts by practice whatever habit one wishes it to contact.

~ Socrates ~

Thinking is a habit, and like any other habit, it can be changed; it just takes effort and repetition.

~ John Eliot, Ph.D. ~

Stop the habit of wishful thinking and start the habit of thoughtful wishes.

~ Mary Martin ~

It is the habitual thought that frames itself into our life. It affects us even more than our intimate social relations do. Our confidential friends have not so much to do in shaping our lives as the thoughts have which we harbor.

~ J. W. Teal ~

Success is a habit which can be acquired by the exercise of a moderate amount of intelligence, a great deal of hard work, and an unswerving sincerity of purpose.

~- Major General Herbert Leonard Grills ~

Whatever you habitually think yourself to be, that you are. You must form, now, a greater and better habit; you must form a conception of yourself as a being of limitless power, and habitually think that you are that being. It is the habitual, not the periodical thought that decides your destiny.

~ Wallace D. Wattles ~

People do not decide their futures, they decide their habits and their habits decide their futures.

~ FM Alexander ~

Excellence is an art won by training and habituation. We do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence, but we rather have those because we have acted rightly. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit.

~ Aristotle ~

Once you learn to quit, it becomes a habit.

~ Vince Lombardi ~

There is no more miserable human being than one in whom nothing is habitual but indecision.

~ William James ~

The successful person has the habit of doing the things failures don’t like to do… They don’t like doing them either necessarily. But their disliking is subordinated to the strength of their purpose.

~ E. M. Gray ~

I will form good habits and become their slaves.

~ Og Mandino ~

Feeling sorry for yourself, and you present condition, is not only a waste of energy but the worst habit you could possibly have.

~ Dale Carnegie ~

Until you have learned to be tolerant with those who do not always agree with you; until you have cultivated the habit of saying some kind word of those whom you do not admire; until you have formed the habit of looking for the good instead of the bad there is in others, you will be neither successful nor happy.

~ Napoleon Hill ~

Habit is a cable; we weave a thread of it each day, and at last we cannot break it.

~ Horace Mann ~

Each year one vicious habit discarded, in time might make the worst of us good.

~ Benjamin Franklin ~

Procrastination is the bad habit of putting off until the day after tomorrow what should have been done the day before yesterday.

~ Napoleon Hill ~

Days 20 and 21! Two more days to a powerful new success habit…ORGANIZATION!

The message below was sent to participants of the Facebook event…21 Days of ACTION with Organizing Your Life.

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Hello!

A quick reminder for those in relax and celebrate mode (Memorial Day here in the US) – DO something today, even if a very short amount of time is assigned, that brings you closer to the organized life you dream of living.

We overestimate the time needed and often exaggerate the emotional burden of unfinished projects.

It would be ideal to COMPLETE a project today…and if that’s not possible at least take a few steps in that direction.

A specific request:

Write a short entry in your organization journal/file -

***Ideally, what is the legacy you would like to leave in the area of community service?***

If you can devote just 15 – 20 minutes to a few action items today (including writing time) that would be splendid!

Then of course CELEBRATE!

Enjoy…relax…and celebrate your commitment to this process of organizing your life.

Wishing you joy and laughter,
Julette
♥~

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Day 21 — LAST Day of our 21 Days program…are you organized yet?

Hi there!

[I'm unable to write a complete message today...will follow up asap.]

C O N G R A T U L A T I O N S to you for completing 21 Days of Action with Organizing Your Life !!!!!!

Be sure to DO something specific today…the last day doesn’t mean, do less or nothing. It means for the 21st time, take an action step, do something in the area of organization.

Touch base with your accountability partner…some support and encouragement might be needed.

This is also a good day to review all messages and action requests…what have you not completed?

Be well…all previous messages are here ►►► http://successhabitsin21days.com

Video message sent on Sunday is here ►►►http://www.facebook.com/video/?upload#/video/video.php?v=1144314682694&ref=mf

Peace and Love to you,
Julette
♥~

Day 17 Organizing in the Community Venue!

The message below was sent on Friday May 22 (Day 17) to participants of the event – 21 Days of ACTION with Organizing Your Life – a Facebook event.

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Hi everyone!

Our 21 Days of Organizing is moving into the last lap. We’ve approached this event from the perspective that an organized life is one that has order and clarity in ALL areas of life.

Not just at home, or one room at home.

It’s not just the ability to have an organized and efficient office but your car is a disaster zone.

It’s certainly not the ability to shove things into corners or drawers with public spaces looking gorgeous.

An organized life is something that comes from how you life ALL of your life. It’s a result of who you are.

With this in mind, we’ve spent days on organizing your correspondence, ideas, emotions, home spaces, work spaces and offices and today we move on…

Days 17-20 are dedicated to organizing community projects, volunteer files, vehicles and projects at houses of worship…

For Today:

Spend at least 15 minutes on a DOING some organizing and 15 minutes on planning…if more time is available, do more!

1) Plan out the next 4 days…which projects will you take on?

2) If you’re involved in your community – does each project have its own file or folder? If no, make that happen.

3) If you’re not, create files for those projects you’d LOVE to take on as soon as possible. (this weekend perhaps?)

4) Clean out your vehicle if you drive one. If this is a huge job – start with the front, glove compartment and small storage areas. End with the trunk or back area.

5) Then of course CELEBRATE!

I truly hope you’re having fun with this organizing project. If you’re not, try changing your mind – your thoughts – by DECIDING to LOVE the order and clarity, clearance and systems that give rise to success, joy and creativity.

When “work” is placed in perspective and seen as a necessary means to a desired end, re-framing our mindset becomes easier.

I hope you have a truly magnificent weekend and those of you in the US have a safe and relaxing Memorial weekend.
(still do at least 15 minutes each day of organizing – vehicles, files, projects at POW – Place of Worship, community projects, etc)

Let’s honor our heroes with how we choose to live today.

Wishing you an abundance of love and light,
Julette
♥~

Day 19 – Organize Your Community Service, Leave a Legacy!

The video message below was sent on Sunday May 24th to participants of the Facebook event — 21 Days of ACTION with Organizing Your Life.

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Hi there,

This video explains why the “community venue” is an essential part of this event; being organized as you serve is an imperative!

And I share one of my deepest passions

Wishing you all that is good and wonderful,
Julette
♥~

See Video on Facebook here ► Day 19 Video Message

Day 16 – Organizing ideas in work venue.

The message below was sent to the participants of the Facebook event, 21 Days of ACTION with Organizing Your Life.  Details are here.

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Hello!

Today is the day to organize your ideas pertaining to your business, work or studies.

Do the following:

1) Have a PBS – Private Brainstorming Session.

• Allot 10 minutes to this session. Take care of possible interruptions by alerting folks, turning phone off and by going into a private space.
• Get comfortable.
• Get in a resourceful state – however best you do this.
• Then record all the ideas you have to improve your business, your skills, your work or your studies. Just record them, without pausing to evaluate or assess. Time yourself – 10 minutes.

2) Review these ideas and prioritize - select the top 5…those you are most excited about. Label them. ( Keep this list in a safe place)

3) Place dates next to these ideas – start dates and end dates…as best you can determine at this point.

4) BEGIN…take a FIRST step TODAY on the idea you decide to implement FIRST.

5) CELEBRATE…by doing something you enjoy immensely (small but significant.)

Tomorrow we move on to organizing your life in the Community venue, so wrap up as best you can any incomplete projects in the work venue.

Wishing you an abundance of peace, joy and light,
Julette
♥~

Past messages are here:
► http://successhabitsin21days.com

Day 15 – Is your Workspace working for you?

The message below was sent to the participants of the Facebook event, 21 Days of ACTION with Organizing Your Life.  Details are here.

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Hi there!

Today, please do your best with the following requests:

1) Spend a minimum of 30 minutes organizing and clearing out your workspace or desk.

By this I mean:

• open drawers and discard items you no longer need
• put all papers needing to be filed together in one place
• place books on shelves or in stacks where they belong
• all correspondence needing to be answered in one place, bills in one file, each project in its own folder or container
• supplies…organized and streamlined (we often have excess clogging the space)
• and put all items belonging elsewhere, where they belong…

2) Do the above while timing yourself. Use a timer or clock…see how much you can get done in 30 minutes

3) Then assess and plan the remainder of the project (if not complete) over the next 2-3 days. Allot chunks of time wherever possible in order to get your workspace organized.

4) Instead of stopping to do the things you run into…which can/will take you off task (you will begin new tasks, forgetting about ORGANIZING the space) CREATE a pile with a list at top. “Things to do over the next X number of days”

Be very explicit with the action steps. The more detail the better. And STICK to the plan, getting them done by that date. [be sure to let your accountability partner know about this list]

5) THEN…you know what’s next right?…Yes, Celebrate!!

CELEBRATE your efforts, your sincere commitment to performing at your highest and best and your accomplishments with doing the actual work involved in living your dream.

There is no success without order!

Wishing you an abundance of light, love and order,
Julette
♥~

Day 14…take one more step towards creating your new Success Habit: ORGANIZATION!

The message below was sent to participants of the 21 Days of ACTION with Organizing Your Life…a Facebook event.  Details are here.

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Hi!

Today the request is so simple!

Yesterday you were asked to take just one first step towards creating that ideal work space you wrote about.   Today, take one more step.

There’s a catch.

The action step you take CANNOT:
* involve spending money
* take any more than 15 minutes to complete (excluding any necessary driving time)
* and must be part of the larger goal…an organized, pleasing space that is conducive to creativity and productivity

Often we get bogged down with thoughts and emotions that blow things way out of proportion.

It’s a vital message to internalize: Little steps in the right direction take us to our wildest dreams.

JUST TAKE ACTION!

Put aside the emotions and thoughts that hold you back. Take a small step each day…

Then of course CELEBRATE!!

If you have more time available or someone to do it, please do as much as possible over the next 3 days to get your work space ordered and clear…putting papers and supplies where they belong, creating systems to deal with projects, mail and clients, throwing away as much as possible, etc.

Next Tuesday our event ends…so look ahead. Remind yourself of why you signed up and what you’d like to accomplish by then.

Oh! There is one final request:

If at all possible, get outside and do one random act of kindness.

I have NEVER taken this advice without feeling unbelievably great after wards…though that is not the best reason to be kind. It happens to be true though. It feels so good!

Wishing you an abundance of love, light and kindness,
Julette
♥~

Day 13 – Organize the WORK Venue!

Hello there!

I hope you had a really productive AND relaxing weekend.

Friday’s message suggested using the weekend to ‘catch up’ with your organizing…we’ve covered organization as it relates to the SELF, HOME and Relationship venue – correspondence, papers, books, etc…

Today we begin 4 days of organizing in the WORK venue. (job, business, school – for students)

Today’s action suggestions:

1) Spend an hour – or as much as you can – doing some (or delegate if possible) filing and discarding (unnecessary papers, mail, etc)

2) Write about your ideal work space in great detail – what does it look like, smell like, feel like, sound like. If you have pictures that resemble your ideal look, clip them and include them in your writing.

3) In addition to # 1 above, take at least ONE first step towards creating your ideal (as close as you can come to it, with present resources.)

Maybe placing your desk in the position you’d like it in or sketching out the plan, or purchasing a framed picture to remind you of why you’re working so hard…ANY first step in the direction of your ideal work space will be fantastic!

4) Check in with accountability partner

5) CELEBRATE!!!!

Wishing you an abundance of peace, joy and productivity,
Julette
♥~

Facebook event details here.

Use Days 10, 11 and 12 to Catch Up with Your ORGANIZING!

This message was sent on Friday May 15th to participants of 21 Days of ACTION with Organizing. This is a Facebook event.  Details of the event are here.

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Hi Everyone!

To mark the halfway point of our journey I’d like to suggest that over the next 3 days you DO the following:

1) Use today, Saturday and Sunday to COMPLETE all projects started over the past 10 days - devoting as much time as you can. {a minimum of 1 hour per day…how’s that?}

2) Place correspondence all together in one place, separating the pile by “answered” and ‘to be answered.”

3) Make a list of the books you’d like to read this year.

4) IF you own them, gather the top 10 books of your life so far and remember the lessons learned.

5) Celebrate your work, your new systems for correspondence and your new commitment to taking ACTION with organizing your life!

BONUS:

Spend one HOUR writing letters, making calls, touching base with the people you’ve been out of touch with.

A lack of organization often keeps us from the most important people and relationships of our life.  We tend to want to WAIT for things to be easier, better of perfect.

DON’T WAIT…that day never comes! Let THIS weekend be your turning point. Feed your relationships, nourish and nurture them…and this can only be done with love and attention.

So have fun with your organization weekend. Create the joy and lightness that leads to even more joy, productivity, creativity, laughter…do I need to go on?

Take charge…you’re the only one who can in your life!

Wishing you an abundance of joy, love and light,
Julette
♥~

Oh…if you’re just starting with us (we’re at 219 participants now) please visit http://successhabitsin21days.com for all past messages – start at May 5th and do them one day at a time, for 21 days straight.
♥~